Advertising Affective Disorder!

"Verdana" size="+1" color="#000000">My name is Jaye
Beldo and I suffer from Advertising Affective Disorder or AAD. My
affliction results from life long exposure to advertising on t.v.,
radio, billboards, magazines, newspapers, the movies and even on the
deodorant pucks found in public urinals. Ronald McDonald haunts me in
my dreams and tries to get me to pledge allegiance to the New World
Order. The Pillsbury Doughboy claims that he is the Messiah and if I
don't worship him, he will turn me into dinner rolls. Tony the Tiger
waits in the shadows, ready to pounce on me as punishment for trying
to think outside the cornflakes box. Palmolive Madge threatens to soak
my entire body in dish detergent just because I desire world peace.
The Charmin Teddy Bear causes me to fight with my girlfriend. Every
time I try to go to an art exhibit, I see Mr. Clean splashing floor
cleaner onto a painting by Picasso or Van Gogh. Advertising mascots
like Joe Camel, the California Raisins or the Michelin Tire man, movie
stars, athletes such as Michael Jordan trespass into my brain and
demand that I buy the product they are endorsing. Or else. It does not
matter if I the ad was aired yesterday or 30 years ago because the
icons, logos, commercial jingles continue to torment me 24/7. My sense
of time has become grossly distorted as well. Sometimes my attention
span is in 30 or 60 second intervals, the same time that t.v.
commercials are packaged in. In order to ward off the serious
psychological, emotional and physical imbalance AAD could possibly
cause, I manage to respond to the ailment in a creative way so that I
don't have to take Prozac, Zoloft or Ritalin. As an example, I try to
spend more time with friends and family. I go to the library and try
to read. I try to spend more time in nature. It is the only way I know
how to cope with the constant trespassing into what I thought was once
my private property, i.e. the confines of my own mind. While I am able
to function normally in spite of having AAD, sometimes I wonder if I
am being
targeted by the CIA who are using advertising icons as a smokescreen
for their various mind control programs. Perhaps AAD is the result of
some sinister test market Psy-Ops sponsored the United States
government for global use in the near future. Perhaps the NSA is
behind it all. If so, I'd like to know who or what my handler is.
Could only Madison Avenue know for sure? I'm asking for help! I
believe that AAD is the 'silent killer', an affliction which millions
upon millions may suffer from but do not know it. It is time that
those who are afflicted with AAD to come forth. If you think you are
suffering from AAD, please contact me ASAP.


Sincerely,


Jaye Beldo


Contact info:

e-mail:
AADFREE@Aol.Com

If you possibly follow Dvorak, you know he's been pushing the
idea that Apple will put its OS on Intel. Didn't I send something
about that before? Anyway, he's back at it, and here's a Mac guy's
debunking:

http://daringfireball.net/2003/04/qwerty.html

http://daringfireball.net/2003/04/qwerty.html





-rh

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